We've scoured the web and carved into our creative brain power at Oy!Chicago to bring you the Thanksgivukkah list to end all Thanksgivukkah lists. These ideas are not just your one-stop Thanksgivukkah shop, but ought to hold you over for 77,000 years until Thanksgivukkah rears her menorah-crested turkey head once again to terrorize your greatest of great-great-great-times-ten-to-the-umpteenth-power grandchildren.
1. Deep fry a turkey
We've all seen the now-classic Buzzfeed Thanksgivukkah menu. Sure, those recipes look delicious, but come on - one item is clearly missing. How much more Thanksgivukkah can you get than deep-fried turkey? For tips on how to win Thanksgivukkah without blowing your house up, click here. Apparently you can deep fry pecan pie, too …
For more ideas, check out Jewcy's Not Your Bubbe's Thanksgivingukkah Meal.
2. Wrap presents in Black Friday sales catalogs
You have to do all your shopping before Black Friday this year, so put that gargantuan stack of glossy invitations to frolic in consumerism to good use. If anyone gives you a hard time, explain how this year you're thankful for recycling.
3. Combine traditions to be time-efficient
For example, make latkes while watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
4. Watch 'A Rugrats Thanksgiving' and 'A Rugrats Chanukah' back to back
No better way to spend quality time with the family by watching lots of TV! (Hey, at least it keeps Uncle Morty from bickering with Aunt Esther…)
5. Got kids? Get crafty
For a fun Chanukah spin on a traditional Thanksgiving craft tradition, try tracing both hands to make a menorah to go next to your turkey cut-out on the fridge. Steven Colbert offersa great tutorial.
6. Okay, even if you don't have kids…
What's not awesome about these pumpkin menorahs? Nothing, that's what. And they're totally eco-friendly.
7. Pardon a Kosher brisket
You're saved, little guy! It's a Thanksgivukkah miracle!
8. Bet gelt on Thanksgiving football games
Gambling is a key Chanukah tradition, after all. Just be careful betting on the Lions - you might get nun.
9. Open presents first, and then say which ones you're most grateful for at the start of the meal
Boom. No thank-you notes required.
10. Tell the age-old story of Judah Maccabeak
Yeah … make it up.
11. Sing the Thanksgiving version of "I Have a Little Dreidel"
Fast forward to 0:50 in the above video, and sing along!
12. Make a giving grab bag
In the spirit of both giving gifts and giving back, attach the names of different charities to the items in your grab bag, and invite guests to volunteer with or make small donation to the charity they select.
For more philanthropy-inspired ideas, check out eJewish Philanthropy's Eight Giving Rituals for Your Family: Making the Most of Thanksgivukkah.
13. Tell some Thanksgivukkah jokes
Q. What did the turkey say to the Maccabee?
A. "You think you've got problems."
(You've got to have a sense of humor about Thanksgivukkah. Thanks to our friends at Spertus for that one!)
14. Get the t-shirt
Because you will be so cool with your old school Thanksgivukkah shirt in 77,000 years.
Get all the Thanksgivukkah swag you could possibly need here.
15. Pair your meal with proper libations
We're especially into this curated list of Six Beers for Thanksgivukkah. Just pick two more at random, and have a beer for every night of Chanukah! (Seriously, whose idea was it to come up with six?)
Of course, please drink responsibly.
16. Get a manicure
For a step-by-step guide, click here.
17. Share the joy with others
We love this note from Thanksgivukkah Boston: "Hanukkah is a celebration of fortitude and survival, while Thanksgiving is an expression of our gratefulness. Use this special day to remind yourself of the amazing strength and fortitude shown by those living with disabilities, and to be grateful for the amazing gift of their endurance!"
18. Take a Thanksgivukkah family photo
Smile! You won't be getting together for Thanksgivukkah ever again.